Thursday, August 8, 2013

on time

414. sitting next to our son
415. pools
416. having 2 vehicles
417. towels--especially in a van with leather seats in texas with shorts on! ouch!
418. "hi mom" in the morning
419. freckles
420. facebook
421. Kenni discovered pockets and thinks they are so great, its so cute!

I have been meaning to blog for a couple weeks now, but never made time to do it so I brought the computer out to the living room and thought I'd do it now while the kids eat their breakfast.

First off I would like to comment on the post I read this morning on facebook. I was raised that the reason you are on time or preferably early is because whoever you are going to see for whatever the reason, that person's time is valuable. As I just read in the post, it is true people's time is valuable, including our children's time of course, but all people. I don't think I will ever stop believing that being on time is important because if I'm being honest it bothers me when people are late for me, it says to me that you didn't care enough to value my time, who cares that I have been there waiting because I was not only on time, but 10 minutes early. You can't show up late to the doctor or you miss your appointment, so people some how are able to adjust for that and make sure to start earlier, so why do people differ from a doctor appointment? Now let me just clarify here that I don't think you should speed or be crazy in order to be on time and I'm not saying that things don't come up that deserve grace.

Back to the post though, sorry for the tangent. In regards to myself, 10 times out of 10 we have been late for whatever the event because I planned poorly. I don't have smell the grass kids, I am a mom who poorly delegated tasks. I don't want to have to keep telling my kids to hurry up hurry up and in order to change that I need to allow more time. I need to tell them to put on their shoes, close their doors, etc. earlier. I have let go in some ways, we don't go early to park day anymore because frankly no one else really even goes on time, but I still feel like a chicken with its head cut off trying to get out the door for park day. Again, this is completely my fault! I don't want to tell my kiddos to hurry anymore and I need to plan better for that to happen. I plan well for doctor appointments and other appointments because we leave really really early and it all works out and no one is rushing around like a mad woman.

Now I don't have smell the roses kids, but I do have amazing helpers! This is where the rubber meets the road for me with this blog post-not so much with getting places. Where you anticipating me confessing my conviction, well here it is.... My kids want to help me, for some crazy reason they want to spend time with this high-stress, control freak, rushed, yelling mom! I know I don't get it sometimes, but I thank God that they do still want to be with me, flaws and ugliness (inside I am referring to) and all! It melts me sometimes how much they want to be with me, when honestly there are times I don't even want to be with myself. So back to the helpers bit, in the kitchen I am particularly crazy and controlling. It is literally painful for me to have help from slow kids that make unnecessary messes and spill the ingredients. I am aware this is not good, yes thanks for reminding me. So what do I do in light of this lovely conviction? well Tanner just asked for pancakes for dinner so that is what we are having and he is going to make it. I know that the world won't stop if he makes a mess and it will take longer and we won't starve and it will all be okay. I don't want to discourage my kids from helping and from making mistakes and messes and learning from them so I need to let go in this regard. My schedule of getting the million and one things done that I never even scratch the surface of at home. The truth is they are only going to want to be with me for so long and then they will want to do things without me. I'm a rockstar to them right now and I don't even play any instruments and I want to take full advantage of it!

So my goal is to let them help me even thought it will take twice as long, which means if there is something that HAS to get done, then I need to plan accordingly, get up earlier, start things sooner, etc. because this is the part of life I don't want to miss out on, my littles that are becoming bigs too quickly! My version of smelling the flowers is to stop doing stuff and watch my kids experience life, sit with them while they show me whatever it is that matters to them. So I will always believe it is important to be on time, but I don't want to yell at my kids to hurry anymore. I know I will fail, but I will just keep trying again.

Its sad that I feel like I have to explain and justify my desire to be on time, but most people I know are not people who are on time and its weird to me, but I will always try my best to value peoples time and be there when I say I will be there and I don't think its a bad thing. Where my fault lies is when I have to yell at my kids to hurry up because I have not done what I needed to do on time.

wow this got long, I have more to blog about but feel it should be reserved for another post so maybe I'll do another one today or another day we shall see....

I'm off to go enjoy the beautiful gifts God gave me in our children and to not hurry them or get frustrated for not doing things on my time schedule today since I have the gift of nothing scheduled today and no van to go anywhere to do anything :)

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